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OK, so near as I can tell from this article in the Palm Beach Post, Michael Beasley, a 21-year-old professional basketball player who plays for the Miami Heat, is an extraordinarily talented young man who has, like many before him, fallen victim to the temptations that come with such great success at such a young age.

But give Michael some credit: he has enrolled himself in Alcoholics Anonymous, gotten himself back on track, and has been on the wagon since last August.

With me so far? OK, well when you go into AA, you give them a not-real name (you know, like you're anonymous, get it?). Turns out Michael's AA name is (you guessed it) Paul Smith.

Gonna go ahead and take the high road here, say nothing snarky, and just wish "Paul" all the luck in the world in staying clean and sober. If I may be so bold as to speak for all us Paul Smiths, if our name can be of some help in your recovery (and as long as you're careful with it) you're more than welcome. (Although I guess it's not really all that anonymous, since it's in the Palm Beach Post, but anyway).

My only caveat is that if, God forbid, I should ever find myself in a position where I feel like I need to join Alcoholics Anonymous, I am totally giving my name as Michael Beasley.

Paul who?

Michael "Paul Smith" Beasley

Paul is a...

NBA basketball player Anonymous person

How to tell us apart:

• "Paul" is about seven feet taller than me
• "Paul" makes about seven figures more than me
• "Paul" scores about 16 pts per game, my NBA average is somewhat lower
• My name is Paul Smith
• "Paul" doesn't drink - I'm on my second right now